Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Israel at War


Get out your Bible, dust it off, and read all about it.
Nothing new here. G-d aids Israel in times of war and
even fights for them at times. But is G-d with them this
time? I believe G-d is always with Israel and always will
be. If it is the will of G-d, then Israel will send in ground
troops. Too many people are praying for Israel to keep
it in the will of G-d, but the darkness seeps in like a vapor-
ous mist that Israel loves to inhale. So, the prayers could
be in vain if Israel does not listen to the voice of G-d thru
its rabbi's. Those in power may not be religious, but if 
they are, then Israel will be OK. But then again,
I am bipolar and full of all kinds of emotional dissonance.
What I say or think should not matter in a normal society.
I have my own little war right here inside of my own little
bipolar head. So the fact that there are people dying all 
around (Gaza) right now, seems like a million light years
away from my "little" reality right here at home inside my
head. Maybe if I was not bipolar, I could hold on to ONE 
emotion about it all, but that is not possible with me.
My emotions are in constant flux or movement. like the
tectonic plates, they move and shift around causing at times
great earth quakes in my whole being. To just sit idle on 
one emotional and ideological idea is not possible for me.
I can only glimpse flashes of reality while normal people
live in the daylight of reality. That is why I need G-d since
G-d is the only stable reality I know. Now I have to go and
eat breakfast.
 

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

More War for 2009

Troops are building up around the borders of middle East sensitive areas. Looks like something big is about to happen. As a believer in Bible prophecies, apart from the now Gaza/Israeli conflict, something bigger is about to happen. It has something to do with
the U.S.A. being sorta between presidents right now. They in that region are taking advantage
of the seeming, leadership vacuum we and they think we have. Shit might even hit the fan.....
....over.

Monday, December 29, 2008

But I Personally Believe.....

That Obama was sent here from the future
by the Democratic New World Order, in a 
space ship time machine. And that he Obama
has ties to higher celestial beings who have
ties to other spiritual beings who have ties
to G-d. The plan is to take over the entire 
universe by using the power of goodness.
Something sounds fishy to me even though
there will be no fish in heaven. But fish don't
sound, but if they did, what would they sound like?
Who cares? well, maybe the fish do....Do fish have
ears? U can tune a piano, but U can't tune a fish.
So, there it is in all its splendor. 

Out of Touch with Reality

The U.S.A. is out of touch with the reality that its
spiritual side is all but dead. Modern Americans 
have a drive-thru sense of their Christianity. But 
that kind of spiritual fast food leads to spiritual 
malnutrition and ultimately spiritual death. 
While it is true that you can not work your way
to heaven, it is also true that there will be no
loafing around once you get there. There will be
plenty of jobs in heaven. But here on earth, what
gets you into heaven is your belief & faith.

But you can't believe and have faith unless you
really know G-d and what knowing G-d really 
means to you. But you can't really know G-d 
from a drive thru point of view. That would mean
that your view of G-d is also drive thru. I don't
believe that one can acquire heaven unless one
can really believe in heaven. If you have a drive
thru view of heaven, then your heaven will be
a drive thru heaven. But a drive thru heaven is
not the real heaven of G-d who you can not just
drive thru, and still really understand.
Anyone who wants to get into heaven, must sit
still and contemplate upon it. This contemplation
will help build the belief system that will form
your faith. Since it is impossible to please G-d
without faith, then the more faith you have 
increases your chance of getting into heaven.

Faith is your key into heaven, but it is also 
important to know what heaven is like before
one can believe in it. If you do not know what
heaven really is and what it is all about. Then you
can just forget about going there.
First rule of heaven: No McDonalds there.
Also be aware that one can keep all ten 
commandments but still not have enough faith
to actually get into heaven. So, to say the least
it's a bit tricky getting there.  Where?
Where ever it is that you have enough faith to be.
 

Sunday, December 28, 2008

Life Goes On

After all the scandals of 2008, life goes on.
Nobody will care in a hundred years
what happens today. It's all vanity and
a chasing after wind. We humans are just
the product of time and not times creator.
We are the creatures not the creator.
We are here today but gone tomorrow.
We are all just passing through on are way
to eternity. 

Saturday, December 27, 2008

I live in a Bubble

I live in a bubble of my own making.
cut off from most of society & people.
It's better 4 me to just live a monastic
life style away from the temptations
of daily life, and as per my faith in G-d.

My bipolarity is not just in my head alone
especially while it directly effects others.
So the less contact I have with U all in 
person, the better 4 us all. I do believe
that my bipolarity is spirit possession in
varied degrees. I am now working on this
as though it were some kind of metaphysical
mathematical equation through formula
thinking. But this kind of thinking can only
be done while in a mania which I am still
waiting 4.

I have another mania coming. I will always
have another mania coming. So I am learning
to program my projects as per my manic cycles.
Personally, my depressive cycle kills all ambition
to do anything in life. Art? forget it! Not while
I'm depressed. So it is during my manic cycle that
I am at my best 4 creating art and the like.
Mania gives me energy to create and is the fuel
that runs my jet engine of creative genius.

So I am planing 4 my next manic cycle coming up
soon, to think tank about the spiritual connection
that bipolarity has to the human body. I have already
outlined this idea in my e-book called: Bipolarity And
computer I used to write the book on, blew up before 
I could get it all on my blog.............Oh Well! 
I do have it backed up on a CD, so one of these days
I will get it all posted, right after I buy a new P/C
For now, I am coming to U on my MacBook channel
or something like that!..................over.



Friday, December 26, 2008

Xmas is Over

Thank G-d 4 that!

About the Jewish Madoff thing!
There is another part to being Jewish
that is now being neglected by all the
Jew haters. That being the creative 
artistic side. Nobody is expected to
like any Jewish bankers now, but we
all still love the Jewish creative genius
which is made up of most all the hollywood
and New York artist scene.........we like
Jewish doctors too!
Don't hate all Jews, just because of one 
real bad one.

Thursday, December 25, 2008

Christmas Day 2008

I stopped liking Christmas as a kid, so the
whole notion of this day makes me depressed.
Someday I might get over it, but I doubt it.

Happy Holiday 

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

From the Sonnets of Sorrow and Joy

#15

Ill sorrow why have you come back to me,
Did I not send you far from me before?
I packed your bags and shipped you out to sea,
Telling you,I don't love you anymore,
Yet here you stand at my front door again,
Telling me that you love me ever still,
Save God will have to forgive me my sin,
Of letting you in,so you I can kill,
I'll bury you in my backyard at night,
So there will be no witness to this crime,
I'll kill you in the basement,out of sight,
It's best for me in the morning time,

Wait,where are you going,don't run away?
I Vant to have you for dinner,please stay.

To read more of my sonnets click here.

Monday, December 22, 2008

Can't Separate The Two

I can not separate my bipolarity from my faith.
To me, bipolarity is spirit possession as in the
spirit of bipolarity. A spirit created by G-d who
also is spirit. The chemical imbalance of bipolarity
is caused by the two opposing spirits which make


Bipolarity is linked to creative genius.
click here to see Touched With Fire.

The word genius as everyone should know, comes from the word
genie or jinn. The following four definitions are directly from the 
dictionary:

Genius 1. genii 3. a person having extraordinarily high intelligence,
esp. one with an I.Q. of 140 or above.
7. either of two mutually opposed spirits, one good
and one evil, supposed to attend a person throughout his life.

9. usually genii. any demon or spirit, esp. a jinn.

Jinn 1. any of a class of spirits, lower than the angels capable of
appearing in human and animal forms, and influencing mankind
for good and evil. (also see djin)

Muse 1. a. any of a number of sister goddesses, originally given as
Aoede (song) b. any goddes presiding over a particular art.
3. the genius or powers charateristic of a poet.

Genie 1. Islamic . Jinn.

Daemon 1. a. a god. b. a subordinate deity, as the genius of a place or
A man’s attendant spirit

Sunday, December 21, 2008

G-d Loves Even Me

I believe that G-d loves even stupid crazy
bipolar stinky dumb ignorant sinner dirty 
lazy me. So he must love U too. Even the 
demons believe & tremble in fear.


Saturday, December 20, 2008

My Joy Went Out

My enthusiasm and spark for life went out 
a few months ago. I contribute this to my
bipolarity. I am now in my depressive state
of my manic-depressive cycle. I do not use 
common bipolar medications, since I want
to let my creativity flourish, and all such 
meds, just keep my creative mania down.
If I could always be in a controlled mania,
then I would have it made. 

Oh L-RD of heavens armies, please let me
know the joy of your salvation again. Fill
me with your holy spirit and joyful presence.
Amen.

P.S.
When U see Santa Oh L-RD, tell him to
just bring me joy and nothing else.


Friday, December 19, 2008

String Theory

In the physics world string theory is the thing.
I believe all those little strings to be (spirit) G-d. 
They say that those strings R to small to ever
be detected. Thus it stays a theory....... or is based 
on belief thru mathematical equations. I can mathe-
matically theorize the existence of G-d, tho I can not 
prove it....same thing.

Thursday, December 18, 2008

Me in the Darkness



The above photo was taken today of me
in the darkness & confusion of life.
Outside is the light of G-d, but I am afraid
to go outside. I believe in the light outside
and I even worship it, but I am afraid of
it. It's (His) name is Fear, but His love
endures forevermore. Oh L-RD G-d of
heaven, keep me safe within your heart,
& forgive my sins.......................amen.

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

I Believe But it's Hard

The hardest thing 4 me to understand tho
I believe it, is that G-d my creator never had
a beginning. I can even think of and sorta 
comprehend eternity as never ending.
But the truth that G-d never had a beginning
just blows my mind. We understand the 
universe to be approx. 14-15 billion years old.
We Christians believe that G-d created the
universe, but how long before that big bang
moment, was G-d just hanging around all
by Himself?  Can't go there girlfriend!

It makes me wonder if maybe we humans were
not the first experiment at creation. Were there
others before us? As per the laws of evolution
yes! if you believe in evolution thru creation as
I do. All creation is in a state of constant evolution.
And for a G-d without beginning, that's the way
it should be. That is to say, G-d does not appear to
be in any hurry to empress any of us temporal, 
here today but gone tomorrow, humans.
It seems that G-d has bigger fish to fry.


"His faithful love endures forever."
Psalms 136 

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Spiritual Political News


In the political spiritual realm today.
King Yeshua met with the 24 elders
earlier today, and had talks concerning
the Kings soon second coming. After 
the talks, the 4 beasts that surround 
the Kings throne, said amen.

7 golden trumpets and golden bowls 
were marched through heaven today
while millions of angels shouted " The
day of the L-RD is nigh." One angel who
was interviewed said, that "those are the
7 trumpets mentioned in the book of 
Revelations, and that they are being
taken each to his appointed angel."

The L-RD declined to be interviewed but
only said "the time of repentance is now."
In other news, G-d our Father and L-RD
is working full time with cabinet members
in His war against evil and sin. Secretary 
of war and Archangel Michael said that 
"every effort is being made to squelch the 
devils fire at the front lines, and that more 
angelic troops will be needed."

The Ambassador to Earth and Archangel 
Gabriel said "While the inhabitants of
earth continue in their sins, G-d can do
little to help them. But if all humans on
earth repent of their sins, then G-d can
send angelic armies and troops to earth
to aid in that battle front against evil."

Satan on earth has gathered his fallen troops
to enter New York City..............

Monday, December 15, 2008

Yeshua Lives Forevermore


The following is copied from www.messianic.com/

WHY YOU NEED MESSIAH

1. The condition of humankind is that of fallen creatures, rebellious against G-d and full of sin. Mankind was cursed because of disobedience to G-d. Without salvation from sin (removal of sin) mankind is due punishment, in fact death (removal from G-d). But G-d, in His mercy, provided a way of escape from death to people who will seek to do His will.

2. G-d appointed the holy people, Israel, to bring salvation to all mankind through the person of the Messiah (Anointed One or Appointed One) of Israel, the Savior of the world.

3. The hope and necessity of the Messiah was revealed through the feasts (service of worship) and commandments (moral requirements) which G-d gave to Israel.

4. In the fulness of time G-d sent His Son (meaning G-d Himself in human flesh), who was and is Yeshua (Jesus) of Nazareth, to be the Messiah for sin, therefore to be a sacrifice and a substitution for the punishment due us all. This sacrifice was accomplished through His death on the Roman execution stake.

5. Only G-d Himself is not due the punishment of death, so He alone could stand in our place. Having done this He rose from the dead and ascended back to power in Heaven.

6. Messiah Yeshua has commissioned those who trust that He is L-RD to go and tell this message to all who will hear.

7. Those who hear and place their trust in Him as Savior and L-RD are rescued (redeemed) from the curse of sin and death and will live eternally. The full promise will appear when Messiah returns and the resurrection of the dead takes place.

8. Until then those who belong to Messiah are given the "down payment" of the Spirit of G-d residing in them to help them know G-d's instructions for right living according to the Bible, so that people might see their good works and glorify the G-d of Heaven.

9. If you do not know Yeshua as your Messiah and/or Savior, you can receive Him now by confessing your sins to Him, then asking Him to come into your life and make you a new person. Your entry way to G-d's throne will be made clear and you can then learn all that His Word says, because you will have the strength through His presence in you.

10. There is no other way than just described for anyone on earth to live with a clear conscience; to know that all sin is gone; that the debt for our sin is paid, and to know nothing (but our own willful disobedience) can separate us from G-d's love.


Sunday, December 14, 2008

The End Is Near


Repent! 
4 the End is Near

Only after being a Christian for 52 years Do
I finally understand the child like simplicity
of it all. My Bipolarity aside, I now understand
that it is the belief in Yeshua (Christ Jesus)
that he was who he said he was and did what
he said he did, that stamps my ticket into
heaven. Not anything else I do or believe will
get me or anyone else into heaven.

Believing that he was fully God born of a virgin 
and fully human born from a human women into the 
human family. That he died and rose to life again
on the third day. And that he rose to heaven and
is now seated on the right hand of God. That he 
will return again for his chosen and beloved people
and also for those gentiles that believe as well.

Any ?'s



Saturday, December 13, 2008

Bipolar News Today

Bipolarity is Demon Possession. 
U don't believe me.
& I don't care.

Try & have a nice day anyway.

Thursday, December 11, 2008

Bipolarity is Demon Possession.

The comment left below is typical of modern
doctors. But I personally believe that bipolarity
is caused by the spirit of bipolarity given to
mankind (O.T.Jews) by God. Only constant prayer
can keep one stable. Shalom!

Blogger Dr.Michael said...

Bipolar disorder is not a single disorder, but a category 

of mood disorders characterized by the presence of one

 or more episodes of abnormally elevated mood, clinically

 referred to as mania. Individuals who experience manic 

episodes also commonly experience depressive episodes or

 symptoms, or mixed episodes in which features of both 

mania and depression are present


Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Starting to come out of Depression

I am just now starting to come up & out
of my long depressive cycle. G-d that
was hard. Imagine if I had just lost it 4
even a second, I could have killed myself.

That is how serious bipolarity really is.
People with this mental illness kill
themselves everyday. I really have been
one of the lucky ones so far. Keep me
in your prayers.  

Tuesday, December 09, 2008

About My Jewish Background

I remember about 30 years ago my Jewish Father
telling me: "Son, many of your past relatives 
were marched into the ovens by Hitler."

Those relatives were Checkoslovakian Jews.
I was born in Los Angeles California in 1956
so I am as far away from those ovens & gas
chambers as possible. But I still have Jewish
blood in my veins even tho I am a modern 
American Christian. Does that make me a

Monday, December 08, 2008

The G-d of Elijah

The G-d of Elijah is the only true G-d.
Because He never had beginning.

Where is the G-d of Elijah?
that I may worship You who
created the heavens & the earth.

All praise be to the G-d of Elijah!

Friday, December 05, 2008

Back Home Again

I rolled into town yesterday afternoon from my 
spirit walk/drive. Nothing has changed I am still
depressed. I notice someone left a comment about
Jesus & the spirit world & being set free........well
I am already a Christian which has nothing to do
with bipolarity & depression. Just reading some 
book is NOT going to bring me up & out of this
deep depression which is caused by bipolarity.

I put my forehead down on my prayer rug every day
& ask God to help me.......& if that don't work......then
just reading some book won't help either. Besides, I
already know all about the spirit world. There is no
other book written that can teach me anything new.
Depression is not cured by reading some book.
& Christianity does NOT cure depression. Good try
who ever U were that left that comment in the post
below. I thank U for trying. God bless U.

Also, Did U listen to my piano music? 
That would actually cheer me up more
than reading any book.......Enjoy!

Monday, December 01, 2008

Going on a Spirit Walk

I am starting out today on a spirit walk (drive) to
Santa Cruz California, my old stomping ground.
I hope this will help me up from my deep depression.
So this will be my last entry for at least a week.

Angel De Fuego

Sunday, November 30, 2008

Manic-Depressive Illness

Manic depression or bipolar disorder is a serious 
mental illness that often leads to suicide. I have
been one of the lucky ones so far. But even I am
starting to experience a deeper depressive cycle
as I get older. I do not take lithium because I want
my manic creative cycle to thrive & be productive.
But the use of such medication only stifles the 
creative process while numbing it to death.

I never think about killing myself while in a mania.
It is only the depressive cycle that does that & lately
for me, I have been way depressed & thinking about
just ending it all. But it is the hope of creation that
keeps me going & hanging on. That is to say, when I
create art, I feel good & up & proud of such creation
but depression kills all creation while trying to kill
me as well.

Most people with bipolarity just take lithium, but
most people are not as creative as I. Not to brag but
it is just the truth. I am very creative when manic.
So, I need to always be in a controlled mania but 
that is not always easy to do. For the first time in
my life, I am having to fight with deep depression
& that scares the hell right out of me. 

Dear G-d, please give me the strength & will to 
keep living while depressed................amen.

Friday, November 28, 2008

Open Letter to President elect Barack Obama

Dear Mr. President Elect Barack Obama

First I would like to congratulate U on your victory
& say that U have the blessing of the Lord upon U.
I was very glad to hear that U sir will be the first 
U.S.A. President to have a computer on your desk.
That means that maybe someday U will come here
to my little weblog de fuego & see my struggles as
an artist with bipolarity. Not that I am complaining
about anything but rather trying to explain & share
my story with this illness of bipolarity.

But during the sharing & explaining, I sometimes go
to far while in a mania, & call myself the Achrist or
Anti-Christ. Dear Mr. President elect, please try to
understand that my Achrist self is a symptom of my
bipolarity & rather comes & goes. I am mentally ill
& really pose no threat to U nor your purposes.
With that said, I invite U sir Mr. President elect
Barack Obama, to enjoy my art, which is also a
symptom of my bipolarity.

Your humble servant
Angel de Fuego
crazy artist

click here Mr. President elect to hear my music
& enjoy.

On Creating While Depressed

After further consideration of depression & creation
as it effects me personally. I now see that I can indeed
create while depressed as in sitting at the piano & just
playing something improvisational while depressed.
This works well if such music is recorded as in music
software & midi scores. That way I have a finished
written scored piece of music/art that I have created 
while depressed.

But for the M.S. Paintings, I have to struggle to sit there
& just do them. But if I was in a mania, then the doing of 
the paintings would almost be as simple as the music scores.
It is the super energy power of a full mania that allows me
to master all 3 arts music painting & poetry. But while
in a depression I can't even be the master of bation.
So creating while depressed must be forced like disciplined
while creating  in a mania, is a pleasure and ease to do.

I would love to always be in a controlled mania of artistic
creation & feeling great. But since I am prone to depression
then I either have to learn to create while depressed or
die while trying. Where in hell is my genie when I really
need him? 

Christmas is Next

Bah Humbug!
Black Friday Black Christmas Black President


The term "Black Friday" originated in Philadelphia in reference 
to the heavy traffic on that day. (see 'Origin of the name' below)
 More recently, merchants and the media have used it instead to 
refer to the beginning of the period in which retailers are in the
 black (i.e., turning a profit).

The news media frequently refer to Black Friday as the busiest 

retail shopping day of the year, but this is not always accurate. 

While it has been one of the busiest days in terms of customer

 traffic,[1][2] in terms of actual sales volume, from 1993 through

 2001 Black Friday was usually the fifth to tenth busiest day.[3]

 In 2002 and 2004, however, Black Friday ranked second place,[4]

 and in 2003 and 2005, Black Friday actually did reach first place.[5] 

The busiest retail shopping day of the year in the United States

 (in terms of both sales and customer traffic) usually has been the

Saturday before Christmas.[6]

from wikipedia here

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Happy Thanksgiving 2008

rainy thanksgiving day outside my front door. date on photo
not correct, photo taken today.


I am thankful 4 my depression which is teaching me
things about my bipolar self. As an artist I depend on
my manic up side to create & just feel well. The depression
melts away the grandiose intentions & manic ego but also
depletes the energy needed for artistic endeavors. So I am
trying to create while depressed. It's not easy but can 
only be done by forceful willpower. This too (creating while 
depressed) is something new in my life, or at least seems 
that way.
 

Friday, November 21, 2008

Art Lives Forever

Raphael et Asmodeus  M.S. Painting by Angel de Fuego 2008.

My Art like the art of others, will live on
to inspire others that such things R possible.
To see & learn more click here.

Monday, November 17, 2008

True Creative Genius Has No Voice

Michael & the Dragon by Angel De Fuego 2008
click here to see the history of this M.S. Painting.

I am silent, but my art screams genius.
Yet no one hears it screaming since it is
hidden in the back of life. Put there by other
artists now famous yet without true genius.
They whisper their so called art, & everyone 
listens. But what R they saying, but the same.

Same ol rap crap same ol rock & roll same ol 
country same ol poetry & the same ol paintings.
My piano music is real genius compared to any
rap or rock music out there today. But since my
style is NOT popular among all the ignorant 
masses of people, then i am ignored for the
stupid simple shit. That makes me really sad.

I am a creative genius who is being ignored by the
public because of this ignorant world system of
petty shit being put on the pedestal of life by big
corporations of consumer products like those found
in every corner market of life. My product is music
painting & poetry, that nobody needs since they R
all already being stimulated & entertained by other
artists who R really not as good as I or offering the
same old thing.

This one single piano piece here speaks for itself
which I wrote in 1997. I have tons of beautiful art
just being ignored by everyone. And that's a shame!

for more info about me & my art problem.

to see more of my M.S. Paintings.

Go here to hear some of my poetry read
to U & to read some yourself.

& finally go here to see who I really am. 

Sunday, November 16, 2008

We The Mentally Ill.....

We the mentally ill, have no platform from
which to speak. & even if we did, Who would 
listen? I might as well be talking to the 4 walls
that now surround me, & i am. Hello walls,
how R U today? Hey walls, did U know that I
a mentally ill person creates beautiful piano
music? Ya, but U probably don't care!

Anyway, as i was saying, as a person with bipolarity
i am automatically labeled with a stigma, & force
put into a box of their (those who R not mentally
ill) choosing. Usually this box is labeled: Pandora
never open. & when someone does come along &
open said box, I jump out looking like death but
with beautiful art to share with the world.

Does the art give me special privilege? No not really
although it has 4 other artists in the past 4-5 hundred
years. Some artists have even raised up from the gutter
& ghetto, to rub shoulders with Kings & presidents.
So my overall potential as an artist, somehow does give
me a special status among others who R not creative genius
artist like me. & all this of course is all documented through
out history, so how could i be making this up.

Now that we R all clear on this artis status thing & that I
am as good as a King or president, then may i say that
being the Achrist (though manifest as living art) does 
indeed set me at the level of kings & according to history.
I therefore being granted all the rights & benefits of a King
do hereby use my Kingly power as Achrist to declare 
myself insane & to be committed to an asylum nearest U.
Shall we pray:

O Lord God Jehovah, we pray that i the Achrist will be
committed to something & some cause, before it's too
late. What? Forget it!   amen.nema.



Saturday, November 15, 2008

It Comes In waves

When the depression hits me, it comes on in waves.
Until the waves are crashing against the rocks & shore.
Then I get nervous & antsy & nothings agrees with me.
Then I just either want to kill myself or everyone else.
I feel like no one out there cares about me & what's
worse, nobody out there even knows that I exist,
that is to say, concerning my art & as an artist.

This kind of depression is cyclical and gets worse
with age & over the years. This Weblog De Fuego
has been the main crucible & recording journal of
such ups & downs of my artistic temperament with
bipolarity. As far as me thinking that I am the Achrist
& openly declaring it on most all my blogs, is not 4
any of U to be concerned with. Rather it is true or not
is not the issue here. While said issue is nicely put
away in a box titled my insanity, there it stays until
the aliens (in the future) find it, & make me one of
their mythical gods.

As far as the peanut butter & jelly sandwich goes,
that goes to joe the plumber. So, why would anyone
in their right or left mind want to read anything on
this stupid Weblog De Fuego? 
To learn about bipolarity & creative genius & to see
or read first hand about a crazy guy (me) & his ups
& downs with bipolarity & as an artist who thinks
he is the Achrist. Something which is common among
true bipolar people, is their grandiosity & I excel in
this. 

I personally think that my life is a fascinating and 
eye opening study in such things as creative genius
& the bipolar connection. I even openly claim that
I am insane & getting paid 4 it by the State of 
California. Jeeez Luiz what else do U want. If U R a 
psychology student interested in such things.....
......then I'm your man. Study me & be set free on
your way to a PhD.

Also note that the up swing to such deathly depression
in my beautiful art......Yes i am insane & just plain 
obnoxious at times, but my beautiful piano music
makes up for it here and here,


Friday, November 14, 2008

Too Depressed to work

Waiting for the up swing in my artistic
temperament, is always hell 4 me.
No artist can work while depressed.
All i can do right now is to entertain 
myself by playing with my train simulator
or something stupid and simple like that.

Depression 4 me is like death to my creativity.
I just hate it. Hopefully this depressive cycle 
won't last long, and i can get back to creating
art again. 4 U people that R interested in such
things as artistic temperament and the creative
cycles of someone like me.......then stick around
and learn by watching me first hand & how I
operate as an artist.

I create when I'm up & I curse and hate when I'm down.
But if U R new here, U should check out my actual art
to get a better idea of what the hell I'm talking about.
All my art Music, Paintings and Poetry R found from
right here on this page.........Enjoy all my art.

Also, I am the only artist in the world that is a master
of all three (3) arts, painting poetry and music. click the
above blue links to see 4 yourself and Enjoy.
 

Thursday, November 13, 2008

too risky

i am still being watched & followed by agencies 
all around the world...so i will continue to use
the code whisper font 4 this post & in the future
.........over.

I may have to close down all (41) my blogs &
disappear 4 a while underground..............
i will know 4 sure in a few days.......over.

also, code whisper will remain in effect until
further notice. 


Journal of a Depressed Artist

Day 1
got nothing done.
Day 2
got nothing done.
Day 3
got nothing done.
Day 4
etc.

if i could just get my hands around your throat  
it would all be over in a minute............or two.

First comes the depression, then i start to get evil.
then step by step, slowly i turn, until... your dead bitch.

The up beat of creation has the down swing of depression.
While the up beat of depression, has the down swing of
life & death.

Angel De Fuego

Also my spidy Achrist sense tells me that I am being watched
& even at times followed. Both on & off the net.sssssssshhhhhh
we need to whisper now, so i will use this small font as such a 
symbol.

I Can't Get No

I can't get no satisfaction from any aspect of life.
Someone just kill me please. G:-(> Depression is
a bitch, & then U die. Happiness is a warm gun.
Too depressed 4 art, & that's really bad.
could led to war
could lead to blood shed
could lead to murder
could lead to guns
could lead to pain
could lead to chocolate?
could lead to joy
could lead to fun
could lead to life
could lead to satisfaction
could lead to I doubt it
could lead to more depression
could lead to water
could not make me drink
could make me dizzy 
could make me fall
could make me stop.

When I feel this depressed, I just want to
start killing people starting with U!


Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Today I'm Depressed.com

I wish i was dead & gone already. i hate life.
no body likes me.....no body loves me........
...... guess i'll go eat worms.

p.s.

Also....it's a lot more FUN being a creative
genius in MANIA, than a creative genius 
who is depressed. bha hum bug.....i'm just
no fun right now.......warning all stay away
or i will symbolically kill U all.....well i was
going to do that anyway but....what? forget it!

Monday, November 10, 2008

The Voice in my Head

The voice in my head tells me to kill,
but i don't have strength nor have I the will.

The voice in my head tells me to lie
but I don't have words to ask myself why.

The voice in my head tells me I'm God,
But I see right thru such crystal facade.

The voice in my head tells me to hate,
but i only know how to love, though it's late. 

Saturday, November 08, 2008

My Mental Illness....

My mental illness is controlling me.
It tells me what to do & what to say.
It dress's me in the morning, & it tucks
me in bed at night. It follows me every
where i go. It sometimes tells me to
kill evil people, but i am strong enough
to ignore it then. 

But other times it overwhelms me with
depression & i just want to kill myself,
but i am strong enough to ignore it then.
Other times it tells me lies about U and
them & those other people that we don't 
like. It says that U want to kill me?
Is that true?
WARNING 
U R being scanned by the Achrist.
If it is true, then i will soon know it.

Thursday, November 06, 2008

Yes We Did

President Barack Obama

Now that we did, we also can again. Change will happen 
thru President elect Barack Obama. We all got what we
prayed 4, so now lets thank God & be glad that our
President is a good man & WILL lead us his people
out of Bushville & to our long waited 4 promised land

Tuesday, November 04, 2008

Obama Wins Election


Obama wins the election:
Thank U God Jehovah 4 answering my prayers 
to curse McCain & Palin to their failure.

May you Lord, Bless Obama & the task set before him,
that he Obama my lead our Nation back to the promise
land, amen. 

Back Home In California


Rolled into town last night.
It's good to be back home.

To Sarah Palin I say:
I curse a U & i curse a U shoes....
U lying stupid bitch .....amen

Saturday, November 01, 2008

Wireless in Junction

View from our condo in St. Pete Florida.

my leather pants & Harley boots......date on photos not correct...my 
wife is driving.

Fred waving to his fans on Halloween day.... somewhere 
between Florida & Texas.


I am wireless in Junction Texas off (I 10 West)
heading back to California. Trip to
Florida was a success. Photos to
follow later.

Friday, October 31, 2008

Happy Halloween

this is Fred, cause he's dead & ridding in the back on the way back
to California. Honk if U see him ridding by. Date on photo Not correct.

Happy Hallowscream
--------2008

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Business as Usual

Now that i am heading back to Calif.  i am acting
like myself again. That is to say, as the Achrist, i 
have responsibilities to do my holy Fathers business.
So!....I the Achrist command U all to worship my
holy Father God, our Tetragrammaton, by clicking
HERE, (to worship your Patriarch Abraham) or i
the Achrist shall curse U all in the name of our 
same Tetragrammaton. 

P.S.
i wear my zeal for the Lord God Jehovah,
like a king wears a fine robe. So! try not
to piss me off. Very soon now, i will have
power to call fire down from heaven in the
name of the Lord God Jehovah our


Any ?'s 

Heading Home Today

I am wireless at the Comfort Inn off
I 10 west. Florida. Should be back
in California in 4 days. Photos to follow.
We had a great visit with the in-laws.

Happy Halloween!

Monday, October 27, 2008

Now What?

Heading back to California in a few days.
photos to follow. 

P.S.
I am still the Achrist bitches.
No matter where i am or go, i
still am he who channels the power
of the Tetragrammaton........over.

Saturday, October 25, 2008

In St. Petersburg Florida

click to expand

view from our 6th floor condo

In St. Pete at our condo.
click any photo to expand

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

In Chipley Florida & New Orleans

New Orleans

super dome in New Orleans..this is the place where all
those black people were killing each other & just going
insane when Katrina came around to just say Hi!



i am coming to U wireless in chipley Florida
on the way to St. Pete. from California. 
My wife & i have our second castle (condo)
there.

We will visit with in-laws and get & spend lots
of green (usa) money. Does this make me happy?
well, as long as no one (in-laws) gets my wife mad
then all should go OK.

Monday, October 20, 2008

Greetings WDF Fans

my wife.....we R in El Paso off Highway 10

my wife

me

2008 suv.................. dates on photos NOT correct.


Driving from California to Florida.
in a 2008 SUV. R we having fun yet?

Greetings Weblog De Fuego fans. I am coming to 
U from Texas. I am wireless in Best Western Motel
off Highway 10 to Florida. I will be gone about 9-12
days. When ever i find wireless motels, i will post.

I have photos i will post of the whole trip to Florida
from California. See U all at my next post. G:-)>