Saturday, January 05, 2008

Be Honest Now

Be honest, how many people do you
know that have a serious case of
bipolar disorder, but can still maintain
more or less and even have a blog or
two, let alone 39 ? It doesn't mean
that I can hold a day job, but it is a
good case for creative genius, a.k.a.
a fine madness. Besides, you would
not want to be around me in a work
environment.

My case of bipolar disorder is unique
to me alone. It has shaped and molded
the very essence of who and what I am.
This is true for everyones personal case.
I have been blessed with a very creative
and active strain of the bipolar illness.
So far in my life, I am now 51, I have
been up and manic. That's good for an
artist. It is impossible for me to create
during a depressive cycle which I have
felt only a few times in my life.

Creative genius is a power unto itself.
If you were to read my entire weblog
of 39 + blog pages and 6 older blogs,
and get a feel for all my knowledge,
you would not believe that I only got
to the fourth (4th) grade in public
schools. It is important that the reader
here understands that I do not have
academic genius (learned) but rather
natural genius (intuitive) knowledge,
which is not taught in schools.

After an I.Q. test in 1966 in California
that said I had an I.Q. of 187, I dropped
out of public schools at the tender age
of ten (10) years old. From that
point on, I was Autodidact with
my parents blessing. At the age
of twelve (12) I was enrolled
in metaphysics schools.
where I learned that life comes in
groups of threes and in cycles of 7
and all kinds of other cool stuff.

The art came natural. I never went
to any kind of art school and never
had to study hard for music or any
kind of art. I have never gone to
any kind of high school a single day
of my life.

That hurt me a little bit socially in
that I am still very shy around certain
people, and get nervous around a group
or a lot of girls. But I understand why
and that helps with the problem.

At 18 I got a G.E.D. 2 month night school
and the teacher sent me a card saying
that I was the best student she ever
had....no joke. When I opened the envelope
I thought it was a wedding invitation or
something like that.

My potential for knowledge and creative
projects are limitless. Sometimes while I
am writing a sonnet I am also writing a
piano piece, or thinking of a drawing.
I am always in a chess game with myself
or computer. These games can last for
weeks. It's not about speed and challenge
when keeping the mind alert and active.

If you have ever been interested in creative
genius or bipolar disorder, then here is your
chance to study the real thing as it happens.
I am not famous, but I should be one of those
mentioned in the book Touched With Fire
by Kay Redfield Jamison. A still living
example of an Artistic Master with bipolar
disorder.

It is important that you the general public
understand me and know who I am, since
I will soon walk on the world stage and
announce myself to be or not to be.
Some of you already know about me and
who I am. Soon everyone will know.

Stay Tuned to find out what and who ?
If you know, keep it a secret for now.

"I have never let my schooling interfere
with my education."
Mark Twain

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